Monday, December 31, 2012

M/m baby story

Master Chirenon's postings on his blog today got me thinking of the following story as it contains a story where a dom gets an adult male baby and I think it is well crafted.

Friday, November 23, 2012

Act like a boy 17

Act Like a Boy or Else . . .

by Lesley Renee Charles

Chapter 17

Alec's Story

I made it back to my room which during my absence my dad remade into the dream room of a teen-aged princess. The room was dominated by the canopied, four-posted bed with lilac bedcovers and the canopy in a matching shade of lilac. The walls were repainted in a nice delicate shade of lavender. The windows were framed by frilly white lace curtains.

There was a white mirrored vanity in the far corner, covered with all kinds of make-up. I shuddered at the sight of that knowing I would have to get used to my new feminine existance. I also began to wonder what my father had in store for me. Unbeknownst to me at the time, but I was later to find out, my father had requested the "judge" to have me legally known as a female with all the rights assigned. I was not to be allowed to use the men's room irregardless of what was between my legs. I was also only allowed to marry a man which I was soon to find out was already arranged as I was now the eldest daughter.

I made it to my new girly bed to rest and have a good cry. I just wanted to know why my dad was doing this to the family. I felt what I did did not warrant this punishment.

Suddenly, I heard a knock at the door. I got up and answered it and who I saw there startled me. It was my rival on the High School team and he had a bouquet of red roses. I wondered what he was up to.

"Hi Alice, I am here to explain your situation. Your dad needed a great deal of money to set up this place and he had already squandered your family's fortune. He came to me for a loan which I gave him with the provision that you Alec, now Alice was to become my wife. And yes I mean wife as in the traditional sense. You are to become a very feminine being. You will make your sister Michelle look butch. You will be in dresses and skirts, take care of my house and of course my needs. You are to be trained here in all these things, but especially in the arts of keeping a real man pleased.

"I think I will change your name to Alexandra. I don't like Alice. It will be done when you go before the judge and he changes your status to a legal female. I will court for a little bit but we will be married as soon as possible. I love the idea of you being in my care after how you always dominated me on the field. To tell you the truth, your father tried to resist my deal but he wanted this place where males are in total control that he agreed to make his son into a daughter. Now the only direct heir to your father is your youngest brother."

"Why are you doing this? Please let me go back to being Alec!"

"Alex is no more or that will be the case in a few hours when you see the judge. As to why, you loved to humiliate me when we played football. You loved to tease me about being gay so I decided to make you my girl. Besides I always had a crush on you and this seemed a good way to get back at you and look socialably acceptable. You will keep your manhood, but it will be caged in such a way as to make you sit and pee as your new situation demands. I can't wait to have you take care of my needs.

"I will be back later to escort you to the judge. Take care and dream sweet thoughts of me."

He turned and left me alone with my thoughts. I realized that it was wrong to tease Mark about his feelings for men. Now I knew I had to live with the consequences of my actions.

* * * * * *

My guards came to get me and led me before the judge. Mark changed his mind about coming to get me, rather he decided to meet me in the court room.

"I have a petition here to Change Alec Martin Smith to Alexandra Mary Smith. It has now been granted. Alexandra you now have all the rights and privilidges of a legal woman. You now can marry a man and it is legal. You now can only use the ladies room and will be treated like any other woman.

"Mark Alan Chatham, you have petitioned this court to marry Alexandra Mary Smith. It will be done in two weeks time. You have agreed to protect and care for her, provide a home for her. And Alexandra your duties will be to take care of your husband's house and welfare for the rest of your life. I have the papers here where your father agreed to this marriage by accepting Mark's dowry. Court is dismissed."

I turned and left to start my new life, with all aspects of my old life gone for good.

Monday, September 17, 2012

Heart Attack

For those of you who were wondering about my lack of presence in two weeks.  I had a heart attack on Sunday, August 26 but unfortunately didn't realize it and didn't go in to the hospital until four days later.  Luckily the tests should my valves active and most of my heart was ok it was just in bottom middle.  It was recommended that I have a quintuple bypass surgery.  I was dispatched home today.  I am still on the mend and really on all the prayers and well wishes sent my way.

Monday, July 2, 2012

Act like a boy or else . . . Chapter 16

Act like a Boy or else …

by Lesley Renee Charles

Chapter 16


I had to get used to wearing the women's clothes. I also discovered make-up on a vanity in my new room which was redecorated along feminine lines.

My bodyguards came to fetch me after I was dressed in my new clothes, they also told me my dad instructed them to treat me like any other female and that he requested another meeting with me so he could tell me my new role. It occurred to me that I was now a female in my dad's eyes and wondered if he was going to give me the same treatment as Michelle. I hoped not because I knew that I was a man through and through.

My dad bid me to enter his suite.

“Sit Alec, I know you are wondering why I brought you back here. I see you are getting used to your new clothes and room. I have decided that from now on you are to dress and act like a female, but you will not become on, just treated as one. I have found and arranged a marriage for you to a man who wants you to be dressed and treated like a woman, but will still be male although your penis will be locked up in a chastity device. This will be done tomorrow as will your lessons in behaving like a woman. You will be the bottom in the relationship. You will meet your fiance in a week. I have his list of demands on how you are to behave and will instruct you later so that you comply to his wishes. Your role is to please your man. He wants you to behave as a traditional housewife and will be taught how to cook, clean and run the house.”

“Dad, I don't want to do this, I want to go back to being myself.”

“Sorry, daughter it is too late. Everybody here is going to treat you like to woman you are now, even if not physically. Your name is now Alice. I think that will suit you in your new life. Now I have to get ready because your sister Michelle is on her way.”

I was dismissed and went back to my room to ponder my fate.

Sunday, May 27, 2012

Act like a boy 15

Act like a Boy or else …

by Lesley Renee Charles

Chapter 15


I grew up watching Mike my younger brother being miserable. He was always very girly and I knew that he should have been born a girl. He prefered playing with girl toys and was almost always hanging out with the girls in the neighborhood as long as my dad was not around. My dad wanted his sons to be all boys and be tough and aggressive. I was all boy in most things and loved to play sports but my mom also taught me to respect women and girls and treat them as I would any person, and not treat them like second-class citizens.

I grew up and started working at my dad's company. He treated me all right but I hated the way that he treated Mike. My dad was constantly trying to force Mike to be a guy. I could see that Mike tried to give my dad what my dad wanted but his heart was not in it. I tried to encourage Mike to be Michelle and to be happy. I loved my brother and if he would be happier as my sister then I was fine with that.

About a year or so ago, I noticed my father was starting to act strange. He was gone for long periods of time. He really started to treat my mom like nothing more than an object that was there to satisfy his needs. I really started to hate him for that. He treated Mike just like he treated mom, so I was starting to suspect something.

Then about a week or so ago, Mike disappeared and my dad was not concerned about that. I wondered what my dad was up to. I was suspicious that he knew what happened to Mike. A few days after Mike disappeared my dad moved us to this underground bunker. My dad was now treated like a king. He had all kinds of young studs around him. The few women and girls there were there were treated like servants and nothing more. My dad had always believed that women belonged in the home taking care of the man in her life.

A few days after we moved into the bunker, I ran into a beautiful girl who looked familiar to me. After a few minutes I recognized my new sister, Michelle. She looked so happy and she reassured me she was although Dad was forcing her to do this. I liked the results but hated his methods. I decided to see him about some financial irregularities I had discovered.

I marched into his office and confronted him about it. What I didn't realize was that he knew I found out about his embezzling and had changed the books. He ambushed me and made me dress as a woman. He told me that was because he knew I was curious about it, but I knew he was lying. He told me that I better get used to it, because he wanted me to be a sissy for a little while. While I was there, he had someone convincing my girlfriend to dump me, that I wanted to bottom to men and that I was really a homosexual and that my dad was having me dress as a girl to learn my proper place.

I got back to my room and saw that all my clothes were changed into the female equilivent. I realized that my dad was out to transform me like he transformed my brother/sister. I only hope that I could find a way not to surrender.

Tuesday, May 15, 2012

Act like a boy 14

Act like a Boy or else …

by Lesley Renee Charles

Chapter 14

As the woman who was once my father was saying all this, I could not help but feel skeptical of her insights and motivations. I felt like she was saying these things but did not mean what she said.

“If your children's well being was so important to you, why did you make my journey into womanhood one way? What would have happended if I did not like it and wanted to go back to being a man?”

“Hmph, you were never much of a man my dear. You were always such a sissy. I was ashamed to be your father. If I had my way I would have sent you to military school. They would have made a man out of you or killed you in process.

“I always tried to convince you that you had it better being a man. But you insisted on acting like a girl and now see what it gets you. I was kind of hoping that you would have opted to go the man route. I was so ready to convert you into a gay bottom. I would love to have seen you dressed as a twink bottom at the mercy of a more dominant male top. Matter of fact you would have still been partnered with the man I have in mind to be your husband. He is bisexual so it would not matter either way.

“Besides I never said I was doing it for your well being. But I see you see through like you always did. You are too much like your mother.”

“Thank you, I will take that as a compliment.”

“I may go the gay male bottom route with Alec as his real punishment. Convince him that he is gay and submissive to men. That may take a lot of his cockiness out of him. You know he is totally straight and had no curiousity about being a woman. I lied to you about that.”

Out of the corner of my eye I could see my mother standing there listening to what my erstwhile father was saying. She walked over to my father and slapped him hard across the face.

“You Bastard or is that Bitch now that you are in your original body. Must say I like the look. I will not have you do to Alec what you are planning. Michelle, I had no problems with because she was always a girl even though you tried to beat that out of her.”

“You always did try to make a sissy out of Michael. You should have encouraged him to be a male since it is so much better to be a male.”

“For that comment, I am glad that they threw out the male restorative for you. There is no going back to the man you were. Matter fact I just texted them to throw out all of the male serum. There is no more available right now, so welcome to womanhood. Ha Ha Ha.”

Sunday, May 13, 2012

Act like a boy 13

Act like a Boy or else …

by Lesley Renee Charles

Chapter 13

After about fifteen minutes, my dad started to regain consciousness.

“I feel strange. What did you do to me Michelle?”

“I just gave you a taste of your own medicine, Dad or should I say Mom?”

My dad got up and walked over to a mirror and gave out a piercing scream.

“Michelle, let me see what you injected me with.”

I handed my dad the bottle.

“Oh my God, that is my original DNA. You have given me back the body I had 20 years ago.”

“What do you mean Dad? Weren't you always a male?”

“I was born a female, Michelle. Like you I always felt that I was born the wrong sex. In my case, I always wanted to be a boy. I grew up looking like a butch lesbian which is what I was. I met your mother who is bisexual, but gravitated more to women and we fell in love. I always wanted to play football, so when I went to college, I lied and told them I was a guy so that I could play it. I bound my breasts and stuck a sock in a tight pair of briefs and got away with it. I became very good at the sport. I was always very masculine acting and was easily accepted as a bloke.

“Your mother was always the more feminine one. After I graduated college I went to work for your grandfather in his pharmaceutical lab. I made the discovery of the two serums you know about. One day I decided to test the male formula on myself and become the man you know as your father. But before injecting myself I made the back up formula with my original DNA, which you now have injected me with. Boy, will your mother be surprised and pleased she did like me better like this.

“I will have to stay like this until my body stabilizes. I guess I did get too caught up in exhibiting typical male behavior. I am very sorry that I got too caught up in that male chauvenistic behavior. Thank you for trying to help me out, but please next time don't just inject people with substances you don't know about, you could have killed me.

“As for Alec, maybe I should have explained to you that he is denying that he has some attraction to men and to women's clothes. I realize now that he don't like wearing women's clothes and will take that off. I will talk to him about his feelings for other males and encourage him to explore that side.

“I realize that I came down heavy on all of you, but especially you Michelle. I really did not want for you to go through what I did so I tried to force masculinity on you. Are you happier now? If so, I would like to help you to develop into a fine young woman. Besides you will have to help me develop my feminine side for the next month or so. Deal?”

Saturday, May 12, 2012

Act like a boy 12

Act like a Boy or else …

by Lesley Renee Charles

Chapter 12

I am on my way to the medical suite to be injected with the female serum. I am looking forward to the transformation. I assume that it is to be a slow process what with my DNA being changed. It was my understanding, and this is from what the doctor told me, that the serum changes all my Y chromosomes to an X by adding the missing piece. This ensures that my personality will not be changed so who I am now will be who I will be when finished. The only thing different will be my physical sex.

I also formulated a plan to take care of my dad. I think he needs a shot of the female juice to see what it is like for the other half and then maybe he will have a better appreciation of females and the way they are treated. I planned on swiping some of the serum when the doctor's back was turned and since I had a meeting with my dad later today, inject him with it. I hoped that this would give him an understanding of women through firsthand knowledge.

I made into the doctor's office and took a seat in the waiting room. While waiting there, I planned in my head what I will do. I know that my father may be quite upset with me, but I prayed and hoped that he would forgive me. I know that this a drastic undertaking but if my father is left unchecked he could do a lot of damage to the way society is.

I was called into the office and set down. The doctor asked me if I still wanted to proceed forward. I readily replied that I was indeed ready and willing. He rolled up my sleeve and swabbed my arm with alcohol to sterilize it.

I watched him reach into the cabinet, which I noticed he did not keep locked, and pull out a pink labeled bottle. There were lots of both blue and pink labeled bottles, so I figured out that a pink label was for the female transformation and the blue label was for the male.

The doctor then picked up one of the syringes lying on the table next to me. He then filled the syringe with the serum and injected it into my arm. I felt a slight prick and after a few minutes I started to feel a warm flush.

“Your changes will take about a week, but in a few days you should start to notice a few changes. For example your penis will start to shrink and then start changing into a vagina. You will also notice your breasts start developing.”

“Doctor, there is an emergency and you are needed in Room 5!” The medical assistant yelled.

“I will be back in a few minutes. I need you to stay here for about an hour so that I can make sure there are no complications.” He said as he left me alone in the room.

Now was my chance. Getting up carefully as I still felt a little woozie, I reached into the medical cabinet and grabbed a pink labeled bottle from the back so that it would take a while for the doctor to notice one was missing. I saw that there were syringes in there too, so I grabbed one of them too.

My handbag was lying on the top of the counter so I quickly put the bottle and syringe in there and made it back to the exam table. Just in time as I heard the door open and the doctor reentered the room.

After staying there for another hour the doctor told me to go back to my room and to try to rest as much as possible for the next day.

I made back to my room and decided to nap until 7 pm which was when I was scheduled to see my father. I did hope I could get him to relax Alec's punishment but I doubted he would go for it. While he was fuming I would quickly inject him and hopefully he would not realize what I had done. I decided it would be quicker if I had the needle all ready to go so I took care of that. I also put some of my cotton squares and a bottle of rubbing alcohol in my bag. I was ready to go.

I made my way down to my father's suite and he admitted me.

“Dad, is there anyway you could stop the humiliation of Alec? I am sure that he has learned his lesson.”

“NO! And one more word from you about and he will learn how to live as a pretty delicate girl.”

I wisely kept my mouth shut as my dad started his tirade about ungrateful children who treated their parents with disrespect. While he was flailing his arms in my face I took my spportunity and injected him.

All of a sudden he passed out as I noticed him rapidly change into a young, beautiful woman.

What did I do? It wasn't supposed to happen that fast.

Friday, May 11, 2012

Act like a boy 11

Act like a Boy or else …

by Lesley Renee Charles

Chapter 11

I made it back to my room with mixed feelings. On one hand, I was glad that I was going to have the body I always wanted, but at the same time, I was wondering why did my father want it permanent for me? Was it out of love for me, that he wanted what was best for me or was it just another way for him to control me? I did hope it was more out of the first but feared that it was more from the latter.

I was also worried about Alec. I knew that he must be deeply humiliated to be dressed like the way he was. I wondered what happened to get him into that mess and I wondered if I could try and talk to my father to get him to change his mind regarding Alec's punishment.

Upon arriving back in my room, I sent Max to my father's suite with a request for an audience. I found out that this was the only way I could see him unless he requested me. I guess my father set himself up as a king, but he is going to have to mellow out a little bit if he don't want to lose his supporters, especially those of the female persuasion.

I decided to change into a more casual skirt and t-shirt combination so that I could unwind from the crazy hectic day I had. I also had to start my fasting for the procedure tomorrow so all I could have was water and jello. I picked up my phone and called the dining room to request that some be brought to my room.

There was a knock at the door. I opened it to see Alec there.

“Can we talk, sis?”

“Sure, bro. Are you still my bro?”

“I may look like a guy in a dress, but I can assure you that dad has no thoughts of changing his oldest son. He decided to have you become a girl because that is always how you acted and also mom convinced him that it was in everybody's best interests. She told him that Michael would never be what you consider a man to be.”

“Alec, how are you holding up? Do you want me to try to reason with dad?”

“You can try. I am getting an idea of what a woman has to go through worrying about skirts. Heels are torture. I definitely am going to treat my girlfriend way better.”

“I am so glad to hear that Alec. I am also so glad that you are not extreme like dad.”

“How could I be with mom's loving guidance. She did not want to turn out brutish sons. She tried to keep us away from dad as much as possible and under the influence of gentlemen.”

“What happnened to get you in this situation?”

“I found out that there was some funny business in the books and tried to get dad to surrender control to me. I did not realize that in the meantime he covered it so that I had nothing to blackmail him with. He decided to take me down a peg so for the next three months, I am to dress and be treated like a woman. I have also been demoted to a secretary. Actually I will be dad's secretary for the time being. If I misbehave in anyway then he will extend the time. He just does not want my body altered like he has scheduled for you. I think he is planning something big and you are going to be a good part of it.”

“I think you are quite right, Alec. That is what scares me. I think he has arranged a political marriage for me to further his agenda.”

“Well Michelle, I have to go now, I am getting hungry. Rest and I hope everything goes well for you tomorrow. I love you and do not want anything bad to happen to you.”

“Take care, Alec.”

With that he left me to rest and prepare for tomorrow.

Wednesday, May 9, 2012

Act like a boy 10

Act like a Boy or else …

by Lesley Renee Charles

Chapter 10

Upon entering the classroom I noticed besides the instructor I was the only other person there. Guess there are not too many women in my father's kingdom. No surprise there. We need to get my father into the new millennium.

The instructor introduced herself as Penny Brown and begin her lecture. I could see that I was not the only one who did not like this topic. I could tell her heart was not in it.

The lecture made as much impression on me as rain on glass. Finally it was over and I was preparing to leave when Ms. Brown called me over.

“I see he is transforming one of his own sons.”

“Yes, but I was transgendered to begin with so I wanted this change. Of course, I don't agree with his views of women and wish he could soften it up.”

“I am glad for you. This change is not what I wanted and I would like to go back to being a male. He makes sure that I am the submissive one with a strong man. I would love to get my hands on the other serum.”

“I can see what I can do. I know what gender dysphoria can do to you.”

“See you tomorrow for the next session. What do you have next?”

“Lessons on makeup and hair. My dad wants me to be girly-girl.”

My guys came to escort me to the next lessons. I asked them if there was a way I could get a message to my brothers. I was seriously afraid for them.

I was told that I would see them for lunch in an hour.

My mind was barely on my lessons as I was distracted by worrying about my older brother. I was afraid that he was meeting my dad and was in serious trouble.

* * * * *

I was seated at a table for lunch when I saw Alec walk in. He was wearing a skirt and blouse. But that was all, he looked very much a man in women's clothes.

“Alec what happened?”

“Dad is making me wear women's clothes until I come to my senses. If I cross him one more time, it is the female serum for me. I have got to get back to male clothes. But if he catches me in them, it is a trip to womanhood for me. By the way, he wanted me to tell you that you are scheduled for the serum tomorrow and for you he is making it irreversable. You be a woman forever.”

“That doesn't bother me, what bothers me is his old-fashioned notions. I have got to find a way to mellow him out and get things back to normal.”

“I will help you as much as I can Michelle, but I think he will keep a sharp eye on me and our younger brother.”

“Alec, I promise I will not let him change you against your will. Even if I have to give the serum to him instead.”

We finished lunch and then I was off again to see the physician. I realize that now he is getting me ready for the serum tomorrow. I cannot wait to become the woman I was meant to be.

“Michelle, your father has okayed you for the serum tomorrow. Let me explain what it does. It changes your DNA to what it would have been if you were born female. You will slowly loose your male features as it starts to work. It will change your body over to female. You will lose your male genitals as they switch over to the female ones. You will be fully functional as a female when it is done. Your father has also told me to make it permanent which I have done. You will be unable to use the male serum. If you try to it may kill you.”

Tuesday, May 8, 2012

Act like a boy 9

Act like a Boy or else …

by Lesley Renee Charles

Chapter 9

The next morning I awoke early and went to take a shower in my private bathroom. Then I went to get dressed. “What to wear for my first day of lessons.” I opted for something casual and comfortable, so I chose a black skirt and a baby blue top to go with it.

About an hour later, Max, Chris and Alex came to escort me, first to breakfast and then to my first class. This class was according to my schedule to be female submission 101. My blood was starting to boil with just the title alone. Somehow I just knew I was not going to get through this lecture demurely.

At breakfast, my mother and brothers saw me and called me over.

“You are looking great my daughter. Are you happy now that you are on the path to being the girl you always wanted to be. I always knew you were struggling with gender issues. I had hoped that you could confide in me. I will help you to become the girl you want to be. I know that you are going to have some hard times still with your father. I wish there was some way to modify his behavior. I have put up with it for too long.”

Alec said, “I am so glad to see you become who you were meant to be. I know that dad made your life very difficult trying to force you to fit his standards of masculinity. I too, always knew that was not what was meant for you. I will try and be there for you as much as possible, sis. I also think you cut a beautiful figure as a girl. Mom there may be a way to cut dad down to size. I know of some irregularities in his books and may be able to take control from him. I also have some ideas on how to give him a better understanding of women and what it will feel like if he was in the role of what he considers to be the perfect woman. Just give me a little time to implement my plans.”

Carl came over to me and gave me a reassuring hug. “I, too, accept you as my beautiful older sister and will try to give you all the support and love that you will need from me. I only wish that dad could accept you for yourself and not try to change you to fit his bizarre notions of femininity. Alec I will support you in whatever you decide to do to dad. He needs to learn that he can't control everybody and make them do his bidding.”

My time spent with my family, minus my dad of course, helped me to find the strength within myself to start being the person I want to be. I think I can finally admit that I enjoy being dressed up like I am now and always felt that I was born the wrong sex. Maybe in a very strange way my dad was helping me to develop into what I wanted. I just don't know if I can put up with his antiquated notions of men and women.

All to soon, breakfast was over and my guys escorted me down the corridor to the classroom section. They led me to the door to the class.

“Michelle, we will be back when the lecture is over. I know that this class will be hard for you. Just remember the instructor is being coerced to say what your father wants. She was once your father's male rival whom he transformed into the submissive woman before you. I know this because I saw it done and it was not a pretty sight. This incident is what keeps most of us in check.”

This statement scared me. I was now beginning to get very afraid of what may be in store for me. I was starting to view my father as a very crazed individual bent on world domination. I somehow felt that he was not going to stop with just this little secret group. I hoped that Alec was right and could stop him. I was also fearing what might happen to my brother if he failed given what my dad did to his rival.

Monday, May 7, 2012

Act like a boy 8

Act like a Boy or else …

by Lesley Renee Charles

Chapter 8

I guess I should fill you in on my family. I am the middle son, I guess now the only daughter of my parents. I have an older and younger brother who fit the more stereotypical role of male. I was always on the more delicate and feminine side which of course drove my father.

My father, Samuel Smith, is a man's man. He likes to workout in the gym. He loves to fix and repair cars. He is into Football, Baseball and Soccer. He played them while he was in school. He built up a very well-known chemical company which is how he made his billions. He has enough money to buy most of the world's governments if he chose. As you can tell he has very old-fashioned opinions on the roles of men and women. He is usually loud and overbearing and usually gets his way. I hope to change that somewhat especially with what he has planned for the new feminine me. I don't mind becoming a full female, in fact I think that I really will enjoy that. I just don't want to be totally dependent and submissive to any man. I want to be an equal partner to him and share our lives together. I want to be loved and respected and not seen as just the help.

My mother, Rose Smith, is a lovely, maternal woman. I am very close to her as I took after her physically. I am small and slender like her. We are also a lot alike personality wise except that my mother tries to be subservient to my father. I know it bothers her but my father has her so browbeat and intimidated that she doesn't fight back. Don't get me wrong my father has not hit her, but he does tend to use a little verbal intimidation when necessary. On the sly, my mother has taught her sons to respect and treat women better than my father does. This has been successful with my brothers and me. I am a strong proponent for equal rights and always treated women with the respect they deserve.

My older brother, Alec Smith, is your typical 22 year old male. He played Football and Baseball in high school and college. He is 6'4” and very muscular in build. He has a wonderful girlfriend whom he treats with respect and they are equals. This part drives my father crazy but as Alec is all man, my father lets it go. I wonder how Alec fits in with my dad's new kingdom. Alec graduated from college with a business degree. He is the vice-president in my dad's company.

As for me, as you already know, I am slight in build and can easily pass for a woman. Ever since I could remember I used to wonder what it was like to be born a girl. That was something I tried to hide from my dad, but I guess he caught on. I loved to play with dolls and had quite a few girls I grew up with that I played with their toys. When I was in my teens I used to sneak into my mother's closet and try on her clothes. I loved to wear them and loved her high-heeled shoes. When I got my own apartment, I did start to buy my own feminine clothes that I loved to wear. I was asexual in my feelings to others. I really do not care about sex which drove my father crazy as I did not go out on dates. My father hates to see men act unmanly and feels that if they can't act like a man they should become a woman.

My younger brother, Carl Smith, is sixteen and still in high school where he is Captain of the Football team. He has a girlfriend whom he also treats like a queen. He is 6' and still growing. He can devour an entire table full of food and go back for more. He is more quiet than my other brother but still likes to tinker with tools.

Saturday, May 5, 2012

Act like a boy 7

Act like a Boy or else …

by Lesley Renee Charles

Chapter 7

My group of escorts led me down the corridor to the dining room. We entered a great big room filled with heavy antique mahogany furniture. There was a great big table in the center that sat at least thirty people. My escorts told me that was for formal occasions. There were several smaller tables that were clustered around the big table.

I was led to a table that was more towards the center of the room. One of the men held out my chair and pushed me in, like a gentleman would. I was told that because of my busy day we were eating late so I missed out on meeting the other people that were living here.

“Princess Michelle, I guess since we are your security detail maybe we should introduce ourselves. I am Chris Lewis, maybe you remember me from school?”

“Weren't you very slight of build and kind of a nerd?”

“Yes, that was me. I chose the manly path that your father offered and this is the result. I am now muscular of build and get stronger every day. All of us here, chose that path and are glad of our new bodies.”

“How did my father accomplish that, the results are amazing. I think you have also gained a few inches in height?”

“We don't know, he has developed some secret formulas. One will make whoever takes it a man and one that makes whoever takes it a woman. You may have to take the second one, if you father wants you to.”

“I will take that if I want to and not if and when my father forces me to. I am my own person.”

“Hi, my name is Max, I am Chris' older brother and I was a lot like him in build and manner.”

“Hi Max, great to meet you.”

“Hi Princess Michelle, I am Alex Smith. The Alex used to be short for Alexandra.”

“You are a woman?”

“Oh no, not anymore. The first serum makes you a male in all aspects. Like you, I always felt that I was born the wrong sex. I was miserable until your father offered me this choice. I am now so happy being a male. You make a beautiful woman and by tomorrow you should legally be a woman.”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean your father has petitioned to court to have you considered legally a woman. What that means is that you will be a female and treated as one. If and when you marry you will be the bride. Also you can legally marry a male.”

The introductions to my detail were completed. I had three muscular and very handsome hunks taking care of me now.

“Guys, one thing I want you to stop doing is calling me Princess. I see myself just as an ordinary person.”

“All right Michelle, we will drop the use of your title. But you should also know that your father is planning a ceremony to have you recognized as his daughter and be called Her Royal Highness. He is also arranging your marriage to another male from another group who believes as your father does.”

“What do you mean?”

“Well, I mean that you will be considered his wife and as your father feels women are not capable of deciding things for themselves, you will submit to your husband and receive his seed. He will also take over your titles.”

“Do you mean I become his property? Whatever happened to Equal Rights for Women? I am going to have such a talk with my dear dad.”

“Well you can only do that if he calls for you.”

I finished dinner in a definite bad mood.

Saturday, April 28, 2012

Act like a boy 6

Act like a Boy or else …

by Lesley Renee Charles

Chapter 6

After lying on my bed for a few minutes, I decided to explore my new bedroom.

I walked over to the vanity and gazed at the vast area of make-up and perfumes on the top. The cushion of the white chair was a very pale lilac, fitting in with the overall color scheme of the room.

I walked over the bureau and looked through the drawers. There was a wide variety of lingerie, skirts and tee shirts, more than was bought today. It made me wonder how long my father was planning this transformation for me. I really don't mind dressing as a woman, but I did resent the fact that a lot of the current decisions were forced on me. I think I need to talk to my father about his high-handed treatment of me.

I then went to the huge walk-in closet. There were a lot of dresses and skirted suit sets hanging in there. There was also about a hundred pairs of shoes there. None with less than a 3 inch heel though. I definitely have to talk to my father about that. Heels are very uncomfortably after a period of time and it would be nice to have a pair of flats or two, for comfort sake. Maybe if more men wore women's clothes they would appreciate all the torture women go through.

I noticed the photos of me throughout my childhood were displayed throughout the room. But there was something different about them. It took me a few seconds to realize that they were alter to show me as being raised as a girl. It seemed to me that my dear father was trying to eliminate all traces of Michael from existence.

I dread tomorrow when my first lessons on feminine behavior and deportment start. I had a small idea of what my father had in store for me and really did not want to be subjected to his exaggerated view of feminine behavior. I really was starting to dread my decision to wear the gaff. But the only alternative for me in this situation was to be a gay male bottom, which I feared may have been just as bad. I wonder if my dad had another room set up for me with that theme or did he only plan on me taking the female option?

I remember growing up with him and his trying to force me to be overly macho. He cringed every time I shed a tear. He tried to force me to play football, which I really abhorred. I was never what my dad would consider a typical boy. I was always on the quiet side. I preferred to play with girls as their quiet nature and ready acceptance of others was quite acceptable to me. I loved to play house with them and play with their dolls. Sometimes, I think it would have been better if I had a brother so that dad could have had his manly son and left me alone.

My father was always a very manly man. I think he resented the fact that his son was very effeminate. My dad was away from home a lot growing up, so that may explain why he had the time to set up this traditional male dominant group. Knowing his beliefs like I do, I dreaded how submissive I could end up.

My troop of men, came to get me to escort me to dinner for my first meal out of captivity. Well at least I was no longer caged. Or was I?

Friday, April 27, 2012

Act like a Boy 5

Act like a Boy or else …

by Lesley Renee Charles

Chapter 5

“Well my daughter, for that is what you are and what you will remain, I am the Master here. Your fate lies in my hands.”

“Dad, why have you done this to me your own flesh and blood son?”

“You were always a disappointment to me. You always acted girlish and had no interest in football, baseball and other manly pursuits. You also were a failure at picking up girls. I was deeply ashamed by your unmanly behavior. So I decided you would be my first experiment in my new order. I want to go back to when men were men and were the heads of the household. If a man cannot live up to that then he has a choice to be somewhat manly and be considered a gay bottom. If he can't make that cut then he will become a woman, legally as well as physically.”

“Does that mean that I cannot go back to being a man gay or otherwise?”

“That is what I mean my dear daughter. You will begin training to act like a woman from now on. Given your past behavior that shouldn't be too hard for you. You will learn all the tricks to running a home and keeping your man satisfied. I think you will make some man a great wife.”

“What if I don't want to marry a man? What if I am still attracted to women?”

“Don't make me laugh. I don't think you were ever attracted to women. I wish you would start to be honest with yourself, my dear girl. Your mother told be about your stash of Playgirl magazines, so I know that you are attracted to men. Your mother has also mentioned to me that she thinks you have gone through her lingerie. Also, you chose the gaff, no one made you wear it. You could have stopped your feminization at any time. You went along with it and I must say that you make quite a lovely woman.”

“You view women as less superior than men then?”

“No, I do not. It is my goal that if a physical born woman acts like a man, then she will become a he. You have met a few of them, as some of your escorts are female to male transformees.”

“So there is no hope for me to go back to being your son?”

“No, you are now my daughter in my mind and will be treated with the rights and respect due a woman. Now this conversation is finished. You will be taken back to your new bedroom. Also your new name is Michelle Marie Smith and you will never be called Michael Mark Smith again. As you can see I have feminized your old male name. Hope you like it Michelle, if not oh well.”

I was led back down the corridor to where my cage used to be. It was now a furnished bedroom, with a canopied bed. There was a vanity set in one corner. All the furniture was painted a very feminine white. The walls were painted in a lilac color. The bed was covered with a lavender bedspread.

I threw myself on the bed and started to cry. I could not believe that my own father betrayed me like this. I knew I was a disappointment to him as he was a very masculine man, but to go so far and feminize me into his daughter. I wondered how far he was going to take it. I wondered if I could find a way out of this horrible situation.

Yes, to be truthful to myself, I did try on my mother's clothes and found I loved the feel of them. I also am attracted to men. I did not know that my father knew this, but now I can see that maybe that fueled his plans for me.

I guess my dad feels if you can't have the masculine son you want turn him into your very feminine daughter.

Thursday, April 26, 2012

Act like a Boy 4

Act like a Boy or else …

by Lesley Renee Charles

Chapter 4

My male escorts arrived at the Salon and were very pleased with the start of my transformation. They were starting to treat me more like a woman than before.

“You are coming along quite nicely and are quite beautiful. Now it is time to start getting you a wardrobe more in line with your new look, Princess.”

I wish they would stop calling me that. I was starting to think that they meant more by that than I could ever imagine.

The guys surrounded me again and lead me back into the corridor and turned right and started walking down towards a brighter lit area. It looked like a shopping complex to me. I really was wondering how far their hidden enclave extended and why did they need it at all. My curiosity was far from being satisfied, but I hoped that I could start finding the answers soon. I wondered why I was captured, transformed and being held here in a secret hideout.

As we neared the shopping area, I could make out all kinds of stores, men's clothing, hardware stores, bookstores, music stores, supermarkets and finally our destination, a ladies' clothing store.

They led me inside, explaining to the store manager who I was and what was needed before they dashed out of the store.

“Miss, I think we will start with getting you a few sets of panties and bras. I know what to get you since the Master has already decided that you are to be a very feminine girl. All satins and laces for you my dear. We have your sizes already as the salon called ahead. Here is a fine selection of different colors and styles for you to choose from.”

There were all kinds of pastel colors, lilacs, lavenders, sky blues, sea greens, pale yellows, creamy whites and last but not least pinks.

I chose a few pairs from all the colors, somehow I figured I would have to be able to coordinate my lingerie with my clothes.

After we got the start of my lingerie sorted out, I was led to the skirts section. I was told that the Master wanted me to have a mid-thigh to knee length. He did not want me to show too much leg but he also did not want me to be modest. There were all kinds of styles and colors to choose from.

I chose a few black, beige and cream colored neutrals first. I figured I could combine these with a lot of different style blouses. I also picked a few blues and lilac colored ones, with blue being one of my favorite colors.

Next came blouses, and then the dresses. I chose several different colors and styles from each. Then came the part I was dreading, stockings and then shoes. I was told that the Master wanted me to wear stockings and garter belts. So I was shown a very feminine selection to choose from. I was then told to put on one of my new garter belts and slide the straps through my panties. A silky smooth set of lilac stockings to match my lingerie were slipped on my legs. I rolled them up and hooked them to the garters. I picked several pairs of stockings matching my lingerie choices.

I was then told I could not have a heel length of less than two inches but three was preferred. I chose several pairs of black and white pumps for now. A black pair was slipped onto my feet and I was made to practice walking in them. After about ten minutes, I could walk on them without wobbling too drastically.

Then put on a lilac colored blouse and black skirt and was ready when my guys showed up.

“We have orders to take you to the Master now, so that he can approve your new look.”

We went back out to the corridor, I noticed that they did not restrain my hands this time. We proceeded down the corridor going towards the darker end of the tunnel. I really had to try to walk slowly with my new heels, also I tended to lean on the two guys on my sides. I think they loved the idea of having a lovely girl lean on them for support.

Finally we came to a lavish set of solid walnut doors with stained glass windows. There were a pair of guards in front.

“We have orders from His Majesty, the Master to show our captive's new look.”

We were allowed inside. It was a lavishly appointed suite of rooms filled with heavy antique furniture. I was escorted into a study, where a familiar figure was waiting.

“Dad, what are you doing here?” I asked.

Wednesday, April 25, 2012

Act like a Boy Chapter 3

Act like a Boy or else …

by Lesley Renee Charles

Chapter 3

I reached into the bag with the pink gaff. I then pushed my small testes back into my abdomen and pushed my small penis back and slid the gaff up my legs and into position.

The first thing I noticed after put this on was how flat I now looked.

My male captors entered the area where I was being kept.

“Looks like we got us a new girl, boys!”

“We are going to have to set up her bedroom. I think Lilac and white will do it.”

“Okay Princess it is time to get you to the beauty salon and then get you a nice girly wardrobe. No pants for you anymore sweetheart. From this moment on, you are not considered a man to us but a woman and will be treated that way from now on. Your only goal in life now is to please us men and live the life of a pampered girl.”

They entered my cage and told me to hold out my arms which they bound with a pink satin ribbon to reemphasize my femininity. They taunted me about how feminine I now looked. I was then escorted out of the cage and back into the stone hallway.

We turned in the opposite direction than when we went to the court yesterday. It was still dark and musty. They escorted me down the corridor, which after about a mile was starting to get better lit with more wall sconces.

At the end of the corridor we came to a brightly lit room which I could see was set up as a very feminine beauty parlor.

“Is this the new girl?”

“Yes, are you ready to start her transformation into a very feminine girl?”

“Yes, all set up. I guess the first step should be to get rid of all that ugly hair permantly. How extensive do you want it?”

“The Master wants nothing below the eyebrows. He doesn't want her to ever think of herself as a man.”

I was given a glass of wine to drink after being told it would help me relax. I was escorted by my captors to the back of the salon where the electrolysis equipment was set up. It was then I finally realized that I never could go back to who I was. I started to struggle to escape my desperate situation. It was really futile. First off, my arms were well secured, secondly the guys were very muscular and very quickly had me secured to the table.

“Now behave yourself Princess, we will be back in a few hours. Master is going to decide on your new name.”

The technician came over to the equipment and started piercing my skin with the needle.

“First we will start on the facial hair. That sedative in the wine should start having an effect on you shortly.”

I proceeded to black out.

When I awoke, I realized I was quite hairless from the eyebrows down. I was told that in another few weeks I would have another session and few more after that to make sure they got all the hair.

I was escorted to a private room and given a pair of lilac satin and lace panties to wear. I slid them up over the gaff. I still could not get over how feminine my crotch now looked.

“I am now going to glue these breast forms on you. They should stay put for a few days. You are a lucky girl you will be a C cup.”

Her words sent a shiver up my back. I was now past the moment of no return. I had no idea what my captors were up to. I was starting to fear that I was going to be a toy to them though. I wondered who this Master was and what was his nefarious plans for me.

The glue felt wet and cold and I was told to hold the breasts in place for a few moments will the glue set. After that I released them feeling the strange weight now on my chest. She went to get the matching bra and had me put that on. I glanced in the mirror and gazed at my new feminine shape.

I was led to the beautician's chair and strapped in so that I could not escape. A nail technician came over and started to give me ½ inch extensions. She decided to do my nails in a lavender shade to compliment my lingerie. The hair technician got out hair extensions that matched my hair color exactly.

“The Master wants you to have long hair sweetie. We don't want to disappoint him, do we?”

While she was working on my hair, I wondered how I ever got in this mess and how was I going to get out. I wondered why it was a crime not to act masculine if you were a guy. I really liked being a guy, just not a macho one. I liked being a gentle guy, but I guess that is what got me into this mess. As these more permanent procedures were being done to me, I realized that I was going to have to get used to being a more feminine girl. The Master, I can't wait to meet him, really wanted to eliminate any signs of maleness in me.

After my hair was styled and set, the technician started to work on my make-up.

“Don't worry about what I am doing now, tomorrow you will start having lessons on how to do your own make-up and hair. This is just to give you a more feminine appearance for when you go shopping later.”

Thursday, April 19, 2012


Today, I am mourning the loss of my cat, Celeste.  She was a wonderful joy to me and I miss her terribly.  She was a great source of love.  She was a very determined cat and I am going to miss the battles of her jumping in the basket of freshly laundered clothes.

Saturday, April 14, 2012

I Was A Craig's List Trophy Wife Part 5

I Was A Craig's List Trophy Wife – Part 5

by Lesley Renee Charles

Will telephoned me that night, requesting a date. We decided that since the next day was Saturday we would have a picnic in the park. He told me that he would pick me up at my house and drive me to the park. He sounded like such a gentleman. He also said that he would stop at a restaurant that had great barbecued chicken and cole slaw and get it packed up. He told me that all I had to worry about was looking beautiful and he said that should not be too hard for me to do.

I went to bed at a reasonable time, trying to plan what I should wear. I wanted to make a great impression for our first date, yet did not want to wear an outfit that would get ruined by grass stains and/or greasy chicken. I was looking forward to meeting Will as I liked how he sounded over the phone and in his e-mails.

After waking, I took a quick shower using Dove body wash. I love using Dove because it makes my skin feel so nice and soft and it also has a nice soft scent to it. I washed my hair then dried it with my dryer and put it in a pony tail so that it would stay out of my face.

I decided to wear a tee shirt with an illustration of a kitty on it. I teamed this with a mid thigh length denim skirt. I put on a pair of ankle socks and white Keds sneakers. I thought I looked casual enough and it definitely felt comfortable.

I went into my kitchen and got a cup of coffee and a toasted bagel to eat for breakfast. I knew that this would take the edge off of my appetite. Now I just had to wait for Will.

Will arrived right on time. He came up to my door and rang my bell.

“Hi, you must be Will? Nice to meet you. You look very handsome.”

“Hi Lesley, I am looking forward to this day with you. You are even more beautiful in person.”

Will escorted me to the car and helped me in. He is such a gentleman, I wish there were more men like him around. Believe I have dated a fair share of duds.

When we arrived at the park, we decided to take a stroll through the rose garden, which was just starting to bloom. There were all colors of roses, red, pink, white, yellow and purple. They were all beautiful.

“Do you have a favorite flower, Lesley?”

“I love roses, lilacs the best, but I love most flowers.”

“Would you like to eat here by the roses? I think it is quite a lovely spot.”

“I agree it is very beautiful here. Yes, I think I would love to eat here.”

Will placed the blanket he was carrying on the ground and placed the basket of food in the center. I reached into the basket and pulled out the chicken and cole slaw. He also got some corn on the cob and potato salad. The food looked very delicious and I could not wait to dig into it.

There was a delightful, cool breeze blowing that made for a pleasant day. The sun was shining bright in the cerulean sky.

The birds were making beautiful music in the trees. I was being pulled into the magic of a beautiful day as well as enjoying my time with a wonderful man.

“When did you know that you were a girl, Lesley?”

“I guess I knew since I was a toddler. I never wanted to do boy things. I wanted dolls, tea set and beautiful dresses to wear. I used to give my parents a lot of trouble about wearing suits, playing with cars and trucks. I really hated playing with boys, especially the rough and tumble games. I preferred reading a book by myself or playing dolls with the neighborhood girls.

“What about you?”

“I was the opposite of you then. I loved the competition of playing with the other boys. I loved my cars, trucks and toy guns. I loved playing the hero who rescued the damsel in distress.”

The conversation just flowed as we got to know each other better. I enjoyed just sitting there in the midst of a beautiful garden. We told each other our life stories and got quite comfortable with each other.

As the sun started to set, we packed up the equipment and headed back to the car. We were both sorry to see it end.

“Lesley, would you like to go out with me again?”

“I would love to go out with you again. I had a wonderful time today.”

Saturday, April 7, 2012

Act like a Boy Part 2

Act like a Boy or else …

by Lesley Renee Charles

Chapter 2

“You will have a choice to make tomorrow. If you choose to act more manly then the sentence will be vacated, but if you choose to continue on the path you are now, you will undergo the sentence. Lead him back to his cell so that he can think about his decision. Your fate is now in your hands, choose wisely.”

The group of men led me back to my caged cell and threw me in it. Before leaving me they unbound my hands and removed my gag. I was terrified of what lay ahead of me. I wished that I could go back to just a few days ago when I thought I had it all under control.

I knew that I did not really want to do what the group that held me captive wanted me to do to be considered a man. I was not into team sports, especially with the slender build that I had. I was not interested in cars and machines. I wondered why was it wrong for a man to be effeminate if that was who he was. Why did I have to act a certain way to be considered a man. I know that my father and brothers were disappointed in the fact that I did not act macho. I just wanted to be me and did not think that it is wrong for a man to be sensitive and in touch with his feelings.

I guess I have been a quiet dreamer all of my life. I liked to enjoy the beauty of roses and the other flowers in bloom. I loved to smell the fragrance of fresh cut grass. I enjoyed the gurgling of a water fall or the babbling of a brook. Maybe this may make me seem like less of a man, compared to the macho males that were presently holding me captive. I did not know if I wanted to be a girl either. I did not really believe I wanted to live like a woman, but I did want to continue to do the things I loved to do. I just really wondered why mankind was really hung up on what constitutes a man and why if somebody did not follow those guidelines was it considered a serious crime. I was being held hostage by a group of men who followed those guidelines and wanted to force me to fall in line with the stereotypical male behavior. I felt that I was all man even though I had a more sensitive albeit maybe a feminine nature, but did that make me less of a man.

An hour later, one of my captors returned carrying two bags.

“These bags each contain an article of clothing. You are to put on the article of clothing that fits with what you decide to do. You are to be wearing it when we come back. What happens tomorrow all depends on what you are wearing.”

The first bag contained a blue jock strap. The other one held a pink dancer's gaffe. I knew that this second article of clothing was used to hide the male genitals, hence it was to show my decision to be a lady.

I went to sleep after looking into the bags. Upon wakening I reached into the bag and put on . . .

I left this as a cliffhanger. I plan on writing it both ways, but if I get enough comments about either path I will write that one first.

Friday, April 6, 2012

Act Like a Boy or Else . . .

Act like a Boy or else …

by Lesley Renee Charles

I was walking down a tree covered lane, enjoying the fine early spring day. The dogwoods were all in bloom along the way scenting the street with their delicate fragrance. Their pink and white blossoms were glistening like jewels in the late afternoon sunset. I was enjoying my time alone when I felt rough hands grab me by my mouth. Another pair of hands held a rag with some sweet smelling substance under my noise. I started to feel to dizzy as I lost consciousness.

When I came to I was in a cage, naked as the day I was born. It was pitch dark except for a few dim torches on the rough, rock walls. I had no idea where I was, what time it was or why I was here.

A small group of muscular, young guys, obviously played some kind of sports entered into the cavern where I was caged up in. They came up to my cage, one was holding a few strips of pink ribbons. He told me turn around with my back facing him and my arms behind my back. I quickly did what he said so that I could find out what was going on. He unlocked the cage door and quickly tied one of the ribbons around my wrists and tied them tightly. I realized there was no way for me to untie them without any aid. He told me to open my mouth, and while it was he placed the other ribbon in my mouth then proceeded to tie it around my head, forming a gag.

He then told me to exit the cage, and walk between him and one of the other guys. The rest walked behind us, so that I was unable to try to escape.

I was led down a long, dark, dank hallway, and into a room which looked like a court room. There was a bench in the front where another muscular guy sat.

I was marched to the front of the bench and made to stand there. I was starting to get very terrified about what might happen next.

“Court is now in session. Is the prisoner ready to hear his charges and sentence now?”

Prisoner, did he mean me and what was going to happen to me?

Nervously, I nodded my head. Afraid to find out what was going to be dealt to me.

“You are charged with acting effeminately. This is an affront to being a male. Read me the list of pertinent behaviors.”

Another man got up and started reading from a sheet of paper. “Walking with a feminine sway to his butt. Holding his hands in a limp wristed fashion. High pitched voice. All his friends are girls.”

“That is enough to start with.” The judge interrupted to reading of the charges. “I am ready to pass judgment on the condemned.”

“You are sentenced to be dressed, act like and be a girl until the time you start behaving like a boy. You will be taken to a salon, where you will under laser treatment to read you of your body hair. Your ears will be pierced, your brows willed be thinned and you will learn how to apply make-up. Then you will be taken to a lingerie shop where you will receive your new undergarments. Then taken to a dress shop where you will receive your dresses, skirts and blouses. You are not to wear pants or any other item that may be perceived as male until otherwise directed. Your family has been notified of this proceeding and agree to the terms.”

Thursday, April 5, 2012


I was thinking today how I would have loved being a girly girl if I was allowed.  I wanted to have dolls and tea sets.  I remember that I did have a Dawn doll which I absolutely loved and a Dawn doll colorform set when I was 3.  I also vaguely remember my older brother trying to get me to play with my toy cars and trucks more, but I was not really interested in them.  When my younger brother came along, I was forced to play with more male oriented toys.  I did prefer floral printed sheets and blankets which my younger brother was forced to accept.

Saturday, March 3, 2012

Harper Valley PTA

Here is a great song dealing with the issues of hypocrisy and small mindedness.  This is something that anybody that does something different from the main flock of sheep has to deal with.

Sunday, February 26, 2012

Nobody's Perfect

This is a scene from a great comedy where a guy poses as a female roommate to a girl he is in love with.  I think Chad Lowe makes a decent girl.

Two great videos from Footloose

Bonnie Tyler -- If you were a woman and I was a man

Here is a song from the '80's which at the time, bothered me as I was so denying my gender issues.  But I think it is a great song that explores the similarities of the sexes in a way that turns the sex roles upside down.

Sunday, February 5, 2012

To Start A New

I have a very momentous decision to make. Should I go on living the lie I am living now and be what my family and society expects me to be or should I start my life anew and be who I know I really am.

To make my situation perfectly clear, I was born what appeared to be a perfectly normal boy. I was given cars and trucks to play with as a toddler, but what I preferred to play with was my doll that I convinced my mother to get me. I would have liked to get doll houses, tea sets and toy ovens among other things, of course what I got was toy guns and other masculine toys, especially after my younger brother came along.

I loved to use bath towels as dresses and to emulate long hair. I was very effeminate in behavior. I preferred to play with the other girls and usually had to be forced to play with boys. If I did play with boys it was usually with one or two at the most. I did not understand them and they did not understand me either. Boys were usually more rough and tumble than I preferred. I loved to be gentle and quiet. I got along better with girls as I could understand them. I loved to play house with them, except that when they wanted me to play the father or a male role, I would tell them I wanted to be a daughter. I guess I had to play at being a male enough in my life that in playing games I wanted to be the female that I knew I was.

From the time I was three I knew I should have been a girl as the things they did were what I wanted to do. I had no interest in my toy cars and trucks, matter of fact when my younger brother got them, they were in nearly mint condition. My older brother did his best to try to toughen me up and make a man out of me. Why couldn't they just see that I wasn't a man and let me be the girl I was? Why do we focus on the physical body and ignore the gender of the person? Why can't people accept that some girls are born with penises and some boys are born without? Why do we try to force transgendered people to live to the societal roles of their physical body and not to who they are inside?

I remember being around three years old and walking on the balls of my bare feet pretending that I was walking in high-heels. When my friends and I played dressed up, I would ignore the mens' clothes and dress up in the skirts, dresses and high-heeled shoes of the women. I have always seen myself as first a girl then a woman and have to remind myself that I am physically a male when filling out forms and such.

My mother always encouraged me, when visiting on a Sunday, to stay in the kitchen with the women, which was fine with me since I loved to hear the gossip and had no use for football which was what the men were watching. As you can see, I don't have too many masculine bones in my body. I preferred floral sheets and blankets, which my younger brother hated when we shared a room.

I remember the strange looks I would get from people because I always acted on the feminine side. I vowed at an early age to try to be myself always, but I did deny my gender issues to myself and others. I tried to fit in as a guy as much as I could even though I had no interest in girls, cars and sports.

In school, I was pretty much a loner as I did not feel like I belonged anywhere. I was content to sit and read a book whenever I could.

I guess I better go and tell my family that I have decided to live my life as a woman. I hope that they can accept me and love me for who I really am.